what is this shit? | goopy and overpriced

First up, some lip products I just didn't connect with, but like, I TRIED. I've been trying a lot of new beauty stuff lately because putting new things on your face is fun, no? More fun when they work and don't dry out for no apparent reason (the Tarte Lipsurgence in "hope") and don't go on like a sticky goopy mess (Maybelline's vivid matte liquid lipstick in "pink charge").

Milani has awesome eyeliners in my opinion, but these eye crayons were kind of a let down with not nearly enough pigment and a rather patchy application.

...speaking of patchy applications, I have no idea what all or any hype is about with Victoria's Secret lip products, if these crappy crayons are any indication, I should probably just stick to buying their underwear.

 

I'm sure MAC lip pencils are awesome, but unfortunately they really didn't work out for me and I have no use for them whatsoever. Like, I've never really had time for a lip liner and I only bought them because the Russian sales lady sort of handed them to me and like her accent was just so persuasive and like.........I have a problem.

I've pretty much given up on large glitter polishes altogether. With the Revlon ones I even tried using primers and top coats of superior quality and they still chipped away within 48 hours.

Again, Milani does fabulous things, it's such a pity my area doesn't stock more of their products however, I wouldn't miss these eye shadows one bit. The application was horrible as the pigmentation was pretty underwhelming. I actually really wanted to like these and would do my best to create looks with all of them, but unfortunately they were very much a cliche drugstore quality.

 

The L'Oreal voluminous superstar mascara isn't the worst thing in the world, but when you're a bougie bitch and Dior is your go-to, this is bullshit. The primer doesn't really prime for anything special as the formula for the actual mascara is flaky and thin. However, if I ever was in a bind of some sort and I still wanted to feel like I was getting a little extra umph with my mascara..............actually nevermind I would probably use the pink and green one like all the other thrifty ladies.

Finally, and painfully, this Simone Rocha bag just like...was such a fail. I'm kind of embarrassed that I actually waited and waited until it was on sale for me to buy it, but I'm also kind of glad I got something taken off the price (50 percent actually) because that beautiful chain strap was useless after just a couple weeks (it kept unclasping for no reason) and it was a constant annoyance until I had to go to a craft store and tie the damn thing on when it finally broke. It is a genuine shearling, which is really the only value aside from the simple and still charming design, but ugh, the quality is a disaster and turned me off to her label entirely.

Also, the shirt that has been in the background of all the photos is a part of this set I bought seen here. I'm pretty sure their poor quality contributed to American Apparel's financial snafu; the fit/quality on these simple layering pieces was shockingly disappointing as they each stretched to a misshapen mess after only a few wears.

What is this shit? | Scratchy eye pencils, stinky armpit gel...

...and other products I regret buying. I think posts like these are so important to warn people of the danger of wasting money and time on products that are basically crap.

Here's the first batch in this new series on the blog (yes, I am calling it, "What is this shit?"):

This sleeping cap is so annoying. The black dye gets on everything and it was absolutely horrifying the first time I saw it; I thought I was more than just drooling over-night or something. The best type of slumber caps are the gold ones you can get at Sally's, they don't have any weird color transfer.

Although I love Revlon and glitter polish, these were a fail. It's way too difficult to get the actual glitter pieces to stick to the nail and when you finally do, they peel off almost immediately. The third polish is by Fergie and just proves she should stick to her day job.

I just started getting into Nyx products and one of the first ones I tried was this glitter eye pencil. It sucks, the little glitter pieces in it basically scrape my eye and barely any color comes off the pencil...

...here's another Nyx product that I found confusing. I've been using Urban Decay's heavy metal glitter eye liners and unfortunately Ulta had sold out in the pink glitter so I turned to Nyx as I was informed that Urban Decay is the same company behind Nyx--but what exactly is THIS shit?

...how is it supposed to explicitly say EYELINER and then say it's not intended for the EYE AREA??? Moreover, it totally sucked as an eyeliner as it peeled off throughout the day. I still wanted to give it a chance and I thought I could re-purpose it on my nails...

...that was a fail as it basically wiped off in the shower. Another thing to note about these glitter liners is that if you put them too close to your waterline, they burn...that also made me wonder what the ingredients were...

...the hard-to-read printing on the side of this Urban Decay box sort of proves we are not intended to know what exactly is in these little tubes.  

Moving on...

This MAC 150 brush sheds way too much for the cost. I do still use it as a spare brush when I'm too lazy to wash my main ones.

This L'Oreal mascara is overrated and over-priced...

...despite the comb style brush, the product does not cling to the lashes as well as it should and it flakes like crazy.

I think everyone went out and bought this Kat Von D Star Studded palette especially considering it was on sale during Black Friday at Sephora--still kind of a waste of money. Of the 24 shades only about nine or 10 actually work for me. They are so chalky and poorly pigmented most of them are practically useless.

I tried it. It failed. I get why these natural deodorants are created, but the sticky gel-like formula was uncomfortable, it only worked for three days and most of all, aluminum keeps the BO away.

I'm not saying this product didn't do its job, but I felt like I had to use way too much of it; this is what is left after one washing of all my brushes. I think I'm better off just using mild soap and water.

Finally, for those people who like to use hot tools to style their synthetic hair I wanted to include my last attempt at finding a proper curling iron for my synthetic wigs. Again, it's not that the T3 Body Waver didn't work, it just didn't work for the purpose I needed it for.

Okay, that's it. Avoid these things or use at your own risk. Bye.