First off, Pitbull was hosting--AGAIN. I did my best to ignore his presence for the rest of the night.
Taylor Swift’s opening...I have to say her new album is very tempting…but I honestly feel like she has enough money already and I cannot purchase music from someone I feel I can out-sing.
|Her facial expressions were on point though...but that was about it.|
Then Pitbull came back...I like how he had a brainfart when he got to the stage. His jokes were dumb. The Spanish inserts were dumb. Everything he did was dumb. Pitbull is dumb.
One Direction wins something. They’re not even American. Go back across the pond already.
Charli XCX...I love her commitment to the '90s…really, I do…but I was living for that costume change, she does vampy sex kitten so well—with comfortable shoes at that. I was scared she would fall out of her bra when they flipped her over though.
|I hope she took a shower...for that green bunny's sake.|
Wyclef Jean and Magic?...honestly, I’ve been hearing that song all over the place and kind of hating it so I never knew who they were…I hate reggae music…it just has one beat that doesn’t go anywhere. The performance was a bathroom break.
Then an Australian white woman wins in a rap/hip hop category…and she brings a coon up to validate her award.
|...apparently this is the only female rapper he thinks can rap.|
|I actually thought there were five-whatever, the middle one is my favorite, whoever he is.|
|That duster looked gross.|
|Some people on Tumblr thought this was a mockery of the Black Panther symbol, I think that's splitting hairs, but I wouldn't be surprised if her ignorant ass actually thinks that's what the Black Panthers symbol looks like.|
|So much sexier when you look with your ears.|
Pitbull did something else. It was an endorsement for a disgusting alcoholic beverage. Then his one black friend Ne-Yo came in looking tacky as fuck…the song was dumb and the performance was forgettable. I refuse to document it with an image of any kind.
|...that confused, forlorn expression to me was just so strange. I did not understand nor do I want to.|
|Kinda liked his jacket too. Okay that's TWO good things to say.|
One Direction…I love Harry’s voice (that is the ONLY good thing I will ever say). The performance was a snooze though.
"AM to PM" song was my jam. They had the third stage set to include flames so it really wasn’t that impressive. The song was dumb and kind of gross because I don't want to imagine Lil' Wayne having sex with anyone.
Dick Clark Award of Excellence to Taylor Swift. I don’t even care, one wrong move and Queen Beyonce can end her entire life. We all know she should have won that award
fell on her booty like she did last time.
Fashion Faves...I think almost everyone really tried.
|We've seen this look from her before, but I'm still living for it; the shoes were fabulous.|
|Clean, precise glam from Miss Kendall|
|Kate Beckinsale stole the show. This woman doesn't age and she always looks flawless.|
|Always flawless. Loving the minimalist styling.|
|He looked like a rock star in a very sexy way as opposed to a cheesy one.|
|That thread count tho...so luxe.|
|I wondered if that top knot hairstyle was a nod to her ex-boyfriend's sister in light of that infamous Paper magazine cover.|
|Old Hollywood glam from Mary J.|
|She wore a variation of this for her performance and even though her vocals sucked the vampy look did not.|
|I love when she does short dresses, so cute.|
|This is one of the most perfectly tailored pantsuits I have ever seen. Well done once again Jessie J.|
|I did not care for that black dress she wore, but I stan for her so I'll focus on the positive, this look was so much fun.|
|Yes, it could have used some steam, but Zendaya is always taking fashion risks I really appreciate; this color palette was stunning on her--and of course her hair was glorious.|
|I don't even watch The Walking Dead, but Danai Gurira slayed my whole life.|
...and Fashion not-so-favorites...
|It made her look old and fat.|
|How does such a beautiful color end up looking so cheap? Oh, must be the trying-too-hard crisscross nonsense.|
|Those pants and those orthopedic shoes make him even fatter.|
|I don't know who she is, but this hurt my eyes a little.|
I mean, I gotta keep this totally real: that was three hours of cultural misappropriation and seen-it-before bullshit. Even though it was nice to see some new talent being showcased, I still wish it was done with more flare and maybe less flames (literally, like, there was fire every other performance). Aside from the highlights previously noted, I don't really think there was anything too special about this presentation.